To discover tranquility within, it's essential to relinquish these nineentrenched convictions:
Life's a bloody jest, ain't it? Can't remember exactly when it hit the fan, but it was probably a couple of years ago.
I was neck-deep in stress, and one of those days just doesn't cut it. You know, the type where you wake up late, neck stiff as a board, and missed breakfast like it's going out of style. The day's already a write-off with calls and emails forgotten, no gym time, and only adding fuel to the fire. Just one of those days.
So, I plopped myself in the meditation chair, trying to calm the f*ck down. But the stress and frustration were like chain-smoking chain-mail, ain't going nowhere.
As I sat there, tearing my hair out, I felt this intense pressure in my forehead. In a moment, I just let go. Not that phony letting go; the kind where your mind grips onto something else, or the one where you scream "I just don't care anymore" but deep down you're still clinging onto a smokescreen of apathy.
Nope, this was a genuine letting go. I let go of wanting to solve any problems in my life, let go of trying to be calm or stressed, let go of trying to be happy, sad, or miserable. I let go of finding solutions and procrastination.
It was then that I realized my worries were all tangled up in this thick web of beliefs about what I should have been experiencing. It hit me like a ton of bricks that I didn't need to get anywhere. Exactly where I wanted to be was hidden behind layers of beliefs, shrouded in a thick forest of "shoulds" and "should-nots."
Some might call it a cliche, but you know what? I found myself catching a glimpse of the unconscious beliefs that were standing between me and inner fucking peace. Everybody seeking change and peace is initially guided by ideas, but I realized the real change happens when you let go of those ideas, opposed to clinging onto new ones.
After a long and grueling journey with meditation and journaling, I managed to uncover the nine f*cking beliefs we unwittingly hold onto:
- "I need to be doing something right now." This stems from our obsession with productivity and achievement and creates a constant, itching discontent. When we can release the f*cking hold of this need, our anxiety eases up, and our relaxation deepens.
- "When I get what I want, I will be happy." True diversity, but it's easy to get caught up in the chase. To escape it, we need to be mindful of when we have the feeling that we need something before we can be happy. When we see we're doing this, practice f*cking letting go, even if just for a hot second.
- "Finding inner peace is difficult." Another myth that gets in the way. When we strip the f*ck out of the belief that inner peace is a long, intimidating journey, we can start to see the calm we desire.
- "If I express my emotions honestly, people will think I'm weak." We're often taught to mask our emotions, mainly responding to those deemed socially inappropriate such as anger, fear, and sadness. But those who dare to be honest are often met with respect and admiration.
- "If people knew the real me, they wouldn't like it." We hide certain aspects of our personality, defining ourselves publicly by what we show and privately by what we hide. To break free of this, embrace your authentic self, because people will gravitate towards the real you.
- "I should be happier right now." We get tripped up in social comparisons, comparing ourselves to others and feeling guilty for not being happy enough. But happiness is never a constant; it comes and goes, and it's okay not to be happy all the time.
- "Not being the best me isn't good enough." Personal development has surged the past twenty years, and while some ideas are healthy, they can be driven by toxic motives. Strip yourself of the belief that you're not good enough and appreciate and love yourself as you are, without aspirations of becoming someone else.
- "I owe the world." It's tough to admit, but we have the feeling that we're in debt to the universe. To escape this mentality, release the feeling of obligation and start giving people what you genuinely have to offer.
- "There was a time in my past that sucked." When we become so identified with bad times in our past, they get in the way of enjoying the present. But when we recognize that they are far less significant than we initially thought, we stop feeling like imposters, and old memories fade away.
These beliefs keep popping up in my day-to-day life. I still catch myself feeling the urge to share my life story with new people, that they won't know the real me until they've heard it all. Remember, those stories are far from who we are in this moment, what others think of us, and what we think of ourselves is constantly changing.
The constructs might still have a grip on my psyche, but compared to before, they hold much less power. I've managed to calm my anxieties and ruminate less. These beliefs took a lifetime of conditioning to cement themselves in our minds, so it's only right they should take time and effort before they're completely released.
Finally, these teachings by Benjamin Fishel align with those of enlightened masters like Adyashanti and Nisargadatta Maharaj, emphasizing the importance of being authentic, honest, and embracing the present moment. Let go of your conditioning, and peace shall follow.
- In my journey towards finding peace, I discovered that the universe is a mirror reflecting my deepest beliefs about happiness, ego, and personal growth.
- Science and mental health research support the idea that letting go of restrictive beliefs can lead to improved health-and-wellness and overall well-being.
- Education and self-development play a crucial role in understanding and penetrating the complex web of beliefs that hinder our progress towards inner peace.
- By releasing the chain-mail of unhealthy beliefs, one can unlock the door to true mental health, happiness, and a fulfilling universe of personal growth.
